Sunday, January 3, 2021

Helga Kindness

Houston Kraft DEEP KINDNESS—A Revolutionary Guide For The Way We Think, Talk, And Act In Kindness

Houston Kraft is a champion, writer, and author of Kindness. Not the Confetti Kindness found on “products and posts” with positive intent accomplished simply and quickly. Kraft prompts us to think deeper about Kindness. ”What if we talked about Kindness in a way that honored how hard it is? What if we taught the skills that support the challenge and messy work of Deep Kindness in our lives?” (p.11). What if we talk about the type of Deep Kindness that requires hard work, practice, and mindfulness. What if we talk about Helga Kindness?



In his book, Deep Kindness, Kraft shares Helga’s story. Kraft’s met his new energetic ‘airplane friend’ while traveling. During their introductory conversation, the subject of Kindness quickly emerged. With tears in her eyes, Helga began, “There is nothing more important in the world than kindness.” Just three years prior, in a busy, crowded airport, three-thousand people simply walked past her for over two hours while she sobbed in utter grief after learning of the death of her father. At one of the darkest and loneliest moments in her life, “Not a single person stopped to help” (p. 5). Looking back, Helga recognized what she now understands from her experience, “Kindness isn’t normal” (p. 6).


Kraft explains, “There is nothing inherently wrong with Confetti Kindness, but there is a more profound category of care that the world desperately needs” (p. 12). Kraft proposes the language of Deep Kindness. He moves beyond the simple definition to a much richer understanding of the actions required to “creating a Kinder world” (inside cover). “The practice of Deep Kindness doesn’t happen just because we believe in Kindness. It ‘s something to strive toward, and a skill set that has infinite room for improvement” (p. 13). I never want to forget Hela’s experience because it has the potential to mirror a student’s experience in the playground, halls, and classrooms in our schools. 



Deep Kindness requires empathy and perspective-taking, resilience, courage, and forgiveness (p. 12-14).


Mentally I am walking the halls of our school and classrooms, and I can see the confetti of Kindness sprinkled in hallways and on bulletin boards. When I envision them, they still make me smile and are reminders of the countless acts of genuine and heartfelt intent to sprinkle kindness at school. Although I now have a sense of urgency for advocating for teaching and developing a substantial understanding of Deep Kindness and the positive impact it can potentially have on all of us.